Aria
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Post by Aria on Mar 18, 2020 0:54:56 GMT -5
in three words i can sum up everything
i've learned about life: it goes on
The stars were lovely this evening and the perfect thing to calm the stone cold warrior. After a fine day of training and looking after his clan-mates some stargazing alone was perfect way to relax at his pleasure and the weeping grotto was the one of the best spot for it. I guess old habit die hard. Being about his fellow warriors was rather exhausting at so late and with herd becoming so scare everyone seems to be rather stiff or even complaining now. Oh how he finished they would suck it much less shut up about. Icemask hated feeling powerless after and even his mentor need him most. The tom beside lying down on the grass earth down him. How many moons had it been since he lost his mother? Eight maybe Nine? He lost count but what he never lost count how much he changed because of it. There was unending feeling of pain in his chest and he couldn't describe. Was it heartbreak or bitterness? Icemask couldn't tell everything just felt so cold. As his ice blue orbs scanned the stars he couldn't help but to recall something from the past a distance of his former self. He and Tawny when they were playing a game of fun and were laughing the world was above. It almost made feeling something slightly a bit of sorrow and maybe regret. He left her behind like the rest so they would suffer. He hopes she was okay. "I wonder-Who is there?" He spat see someone seem to be approaching him. The warrior arch his back in alarm some dare to mess with him when his sleeping. "What do you- Tai?" With a blink of his eyes he continued. "Is that you? It's...been a while what are you doing here much doing out here alone?"tag: soot
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Post by soot on Mar 18, 2020 1:43:33 GMT -5
| T awnyshine was used to slipping from her nest on particularly restless nights and letting her paws take her here. The Weeping Grotto was a quiet, secluded area of Glenclan’s territory. She often found herself here on the nights she could not sleep, eyes scanning the star-flecked sky for answers. Tonight, it was old memories that had sent her from her nest and towards the rippling stream. As it was often the case. She frowned deeper as she moved towards her destination. She did so effortlessly, her paws knew every root, stone, and patch of dirt on the path. She didn’t need to worry as her paws guided her, her mind clearly still elsewhere. In her mind, flashes of two young apprentices bounded and ran alongside her, like two ghosts that refused to stop haunting her. The pair, one silver tabby and the other, smaller and dappled, followed her. Her dreams were the most frequent place, but now as her eyes glanced around the territory, she couldn’t help but be reminded of them and the memories they brought with them. So it is more than a shock when Tawnyshine enters the grotto and nearly crashes into Icemask himself. It clearly takes him a moment to recognize her, as it does she. The first thing she notices is that she now has to look up to meet his gaze. She remembers when they were the same height, though it seems like a different lifetime. Now, Icemask has no trouble looming over her with his limbersome form. The last time she’d been this close to him, talked to him even, they had been apprentices. Icepaw’s family troubles had just been dragged into the light and the tragedies that had followed couldn’t be easily swallowed. His father had been exiled, his mother murdered. Icepaw had always been a nervous cat, but he’d been a very close friend of her’s. Tawnyshine still could recall the pain she’d felt when he had grown withdrawn, refusing to talk to her when she tried to approach him. Eventually, after a number of rejections, Tawnyshine had given up trying and let him drift away. It had been hard, Icemask had been her closest friend. It had been hard to sit through her warrior ceremony, when Icemask had earned his name too. She found it difficult to sit vigil that night. The other cats who’d been made warriors alongside them had joked all night, but Tawnyshine had sat there in silence all night. Tawnyshine’s breath hitched slightly at the old nickname, but her voice remains steady as she offers a quiet reply; “Icemask, I didn’t know anyone was out so late. I often come here to clear my mind. I didn't mean to startle you like that.” Still she feels slightly shocked, unable to believe how her nervous and sweet friend had grown into the cold and unbothered tom who stood before her. She can’t help but scan him over, finding herself unable to believe this was the same cat. Meeting his gaze for a moment, she tried to look for some semblance that her childhood friend was still there, but after a few seconds and seeing nothing but an unimpressed cold glower, she drops her gaze back down at her paws, unsure of what to do now. |
credit to nat of adoxography.
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Aria
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Post by Aria on Mar 18, 2020 20:43:47 GMT -5
in three words i can sum up everything
i've learned about life: it goes on
"Tch. You would be surprised what other do under the cover of night." Icemask stare the she-cat form.This was his friend or least was a close friend in past. One time he would have given her anything but that before his scattered that part of him to the wind. He could never blame her for it was is own fault. For being a weakling and spineless idiot. He was a nervous coward some who could would be true part of the a oak family until now but even there it was things were still rather stiff. Everything was different now, Tawny had grown into what other would a beautiful she-cat with excellent grooming. She had to her whole life ahead of her. She still seems warm and inviting any a good tom or she-cat would be glad to have as mate. She could start a family and live a happy ever after but him. He was just a nobody and mere shell on a tom. It's his fate was sealed to be a the bane of the clan fighting for his leader and leader alone. The snow bengal break the ice by walking a little close towards her then stop. What could see say that would make the situation any better. He felt something of a mixed of longing? and maybe sorrow? It was weird feeling but Icemask step back keeping his gaze on her as he spoke in rather monotone voice. "I see apologize then. Tawsyshine." He couldn't use her nickname anymore. They weren't kits anymore after all and she wasn't that closet to me either. He was a fool to even speak it. "I don't normally go were others can find me but night is soothing refresh everything and getting after for chatty of camp is quite appealing if I may say so myself!"Icemask sat down mere turning his gaze to the heaven. The cluster of stars maybe feeling calmer than as he would be in camp and after than grumpy. "The Weeping grotto is any excited to see the stars...if you care to stay?" A part of hope she would but other wish she didn't. So Conflicted. So Alone. So Bitter. That all this warrior has never known why should it change now! tag: soot ,
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Post by soot on Mar 18, 2020 21:45:08 GMT -5
| T awnyshine pauses, eyes shining. Icemask’s comment didn’t reveal anything. For a moment though, it seemed as though he could’ve been making a jab of some kind. She stays quiet, the silence around them heavy enough as it was, the tension just as thick and weighing. It is so thick she almost worries that it will choke her. For a moment, it seemed as though Icemask might come closer, and the calico molly had to fight the urge to tilt her head in curiosity. The pale tabby’s paw dropped back down and instead, he settled into a seated position. Elegant, she thought as she watched him move. She recalls a time when Icemask was a lanky apprentice who moved with a nervous energy to him, like he couldn’t sit still for the life of him. His apology was brisk, but Tawnyshine nodded in an acknowledgement. Accepting it with grace seemed to be the easiest and quickest thing to do. Though she was a Pine family cat, the dappled warrior found that tactfulness was a talent that had moved beyond the Willow family. At his next words though, she did tilt her head in question. “Yes, camp can get quite loud at times. Especially now, with the latest pawful of apprentices. They’re so eager to become full-fledged warriors. Reminds me of our little group, doesn’t it ?” And it’s true, Tawnyshine sees the current cluster of apprentices and she can easily see herself and her denmates in their stead. After all, it was only a few moons ago that it was actually them. At the thought she smiles wistfully. Things were so much simpler then weren’t they ? The only concerns were training and chores. Goddess be, they were so young and starry-eyed. Tawnyshine feels the heaviness around them tighten, which quickly brings her back to reality. Truthfully, the words slip out without Tawnyshine meaning to. Any semblance of Willow family traits that she might’ve just displayed have quickly vanished. Her sentimental tone quickly turns sheepish as she tries to backpedal; “Er- I mean, I can stay.” She replied quickly. She moves swiftly, settling into the soft grass besides him. It’s cool and damp under her, but not unpleasantly so. The air is crisp and it rustles the reeds around them. All of the soft, whispering noises blend into their own private soundtrack around them. She turns her head silently, watching his face angled up at the stars. If she were to look closer, perhaps she’d find the exact line that separated his mask from his face. And if she were to do that, then maybe she could help him to remove it after all this time. Instead, Tawnyshine peers up with him. There is something to be said for the sky, it is so large and engulfing. The sky is so dark, it looks like one of the navy jewels a Chasmclan cat might pull from deep within the earth. It is infinite and constant. Sometimes, if she stares too long, the young cat worries it will sink down and consume her once and for all. “It’s been a really long time.” |
credit to nat of adoxography.
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Aria
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Post by Aria on Mar 18, 2020 23:03:41 GMT -5
in three words i can sum up everything
i've learned about life: it goes on
Their little group. "Hmmm." Icemask closed his eyes trying to remember the past sentiment but open them a few moments later. The joys of being an apprentice were cut short for him. He never want to relive it. Too much left unsaid and problems that can't never be fixed. He was damaged goods at best. "I suppose so I don't reminder much of the past." Nor did he try. He wasn't about to give her as sign of weakness. He need to be strong for his clan and leader."They should their moons as apprentice while they last if you ask me!" All those apprentices possible would never experience the same trauma he once had and Mytrleleaf has a new apprentice now. Why did make feel jealous? Maybe because she was moving without him? Just like everyone else no different."You only can live it once after all!" It seemed Tawny was content on staying here for a bit. "It's your choice. No one is going to force you." The snow bengal gaze shift from the stars began to the she-cat for a briefly. He sighed recalling at least one faint memory from when he was a kit. "Quite a lot has face between you and me." Where they still friends or did she hate him for what happened in the past? He couldn't tell where she stood on the matter.
"Quite. You know I do remember one thing from all those moons ago. Why I like the stars so much and treasure them!" He paused to look down at paws. It was such a distance memory. "When I first I first saw the stars for the first time. It was with you and you practicality bragged me out the nursery to see them. I was my first real adventure since I never been outside the nursery before. Tag:soot
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Post by soot on Mar 19, 2020 0:02:16 GMT -5
| T awnyshine’s gaze didn’t stray away from the sky as Icemask spoke. She felt his mark stung a little, perhaps she was truly just too stuck in the past. She frowned a bit, but refused to let Icemask see that his comment had affected her. She didn’t want him to see that she hadn’t moved on while he seemingly had. Instead she forced out a chuckle in response. “Yes. They won’t be able to afford the luxury of innocence for much longer.” The unspoken words lingered in the air between them. Tawnyshine knew they were likely thinking the same thing though; we certainly didn’t. She flicked her tail, not wanting to admit that she was hoping they could talk if she stayed. She knew Icemask had intentionally removed himself from her life, and if she was being honest, she wouldn’t put it past him to act like this interaction hadn’t occurred the next time she saw him. He had a funny way of avoiding his feelings like that. Maybe he always had and she just hadn’t noticed until he was too far away from her to ignore it. When his tone shifted to a softer one, she looked over and saw the silver tom was peering down at his paws. His words intrigued her and she wondered briefly what was so dear to him, that it had melted his frosty exterior. She offered a smile as he described one of the first memories Tawnyshine had from her days in the Nursery. They’d both been young, maybe only a few moons old. She’d overheard from the apprentices that there was a wonderful spot to go and see the stars at night. She'd practically begged one of the younger one to sneak her out and when she had seen it, she was sure she needed to share it with someone else too. So she had decided Icekit would be the one. She had barely known the tom at the time, but she wanted to change that. He always seemed to be alone and Tawnykit was a true Pine family cat, even at that age. So she’d extended the offer and all but dragged him out the next night. Sure the consequences had been pretty rough after they got caught by an older apprentice, but they’d suffered through it together. Tawnyshine blinked appreciatively and then added; “I was so nervous, I kept worrying I would mess up and get us lost on the way here,” She laughed, before shrugging. “Now I’m sure I could find my way here with my eyes closed.” She let the sweetness of the memory linger for a moment before turning back to the tom. “Icemask, what happened ? Why did we stop being friends ?” Her voice is nearly a whisper, but it’s steady. The calico molly decided she was done beating around the bush and that it was time to ask the real questions she had on her mind. After all, it was these questions that kept her from sleeping and had sent her to the grotto in the first place. |
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Aria
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Post by Aria on Mar 19, 2020 0:47:31 GMT -5
in three words i can sum up everything
i've learned about life: it goes on
He should have known that was coming. Icemask stiffened again with g a lump in his throat. He felt rather a bitterness with a mixed of guilt. To shove someone like her was hard. She was someone who he at one point cared deeply about-one who he would have die but he move on from that on...right? Sealed wounds have now reopened and he could feel every one of them. Icemask did it so she wouldn't have to suffer. So she could grow and have be happily ever after. He wanted Tawsyshine to have the life he could never have What there some wrong for him to be so selfless? The warrior shook his head, "Your smarter than you look you know. It's not surprising at all." He wanted to feeling something- anything but this tension bitter taste in his mouth or soreness in soul. It was so gross Icemask hated it. He was feelings his sins crawling on his back but then again every felt it at some point eventually. "Life can be cruel and flitting it's not your fault but answer this me." Icemask look Tawsyshine right in the eyes. He was a real answer from the heart. "When the world turn it's back you cats you through who were close betrayal and even bullym what do you?"He then stood braking the eye contact began walked toward a flower blue and white flower partially forgetting her and himself in his monologue."You have no family left and everyone thinks you a lose cause now more than ever. You only have one cat left who had a honest life. She has her life ahead of her too." He softly touch tips of petal with his paw. "A good life were she could get her happily ever after and not have bare your burdens of being label a traitor and coward. You know they would stick to you for the worst but you want the better for them so you push the trigger."
Without a moment more crushed the flower into the dust. He felt to vent out this ending frustration. He was upset with happen but he wouldn't change it for the world. If only to see that his friend was okay. "You push her away with a heavy heart so you could protect her and without no one sat you side it comes easily to become numb. No more fake smiles or faking period you become a mere shell of former self but knowing that the cat you cared about is living and happy put your at ease. Tell me are you wrong for what you did? Are you for being selfless instead of selfish?"
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Post by soot on Mar 19, 2020 2:27:38 GMT -5
| T awnyshine could tell she’d overstepped just from the tense set of his jaw, from the way Icemask practically spit the words out. She could feel the temperature around them drop. Suddenly, the dampness beneath her was no longer cool and pleasant, but uncomfortable. She stifled the urge to fluff out her coat and instead made sure to hold his gaze strongly. She lifted her chin, as he stood and stalked off. She waited a moment before leaping to her paws to follow him. Her eyes focus on the flower as he speaks. She watches as his gentle touch turns forceful and the flower crumbles underneath it. Her frown deepens, but she doesn’t say anything yet. She lets the silver bengal finish before she even lifts a paw to move. Silently, she moves closer and replies; “Selfless ? You pushed everyone out of your life, Icemask. All we wanted was to do was help you, you can’t possibly be mad at anyone for not wanting to see you go through all of that alone! Nobody wanted you to deal with everything that happened at such a young age, especially not by yourself!” She stands at his side, blinking in the now chilly air. It is a reminder of two things for her. One, that is now early Leafbare and Leaffall is coming, and two, that time has passed despite how she wished it hadn’t. She frowns, wanting to fix this situation. But Tawnyshine isn’t sure how to, or if Icemask even wants her to. “Icemask do you really think you’re a shell of a cat ? Do you really think everyone is better while you live like this ?” She asks, her voice has turned pleading. She wants to think she could have foreseen this and done something to prevent it. But it’s becoming rapidly more clear to her that there was nothing she could’ve done. |
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Post by Aria on Mar 19, 2020 5:00:53 GMT -5
in three words i can sum up everything
i've learned about life: it goes on
Exactly. That was exactly what Icemask expected from her. She didn't understand lick about what happened. Only who seems two cats to who care about him all those moons. Only TWO that stayed by him everyone when reach out for them with open paws pleading for comfort only to turn their backs on him without hesitation. It was only her- Tawny and his mentor he had left but push them both away mainly Tawnsy because he didn't want to lose everything she had worked so hard for. The whole of Oak family was a ruthless family deep down but don't regret it what he did only did he didn't push hard enough to keep her away. The silver bengal growled sinking his claws into hard earth below him. Tawny wasn't there nor understood what his feelings. So why he pouring his heart to her? Why did feeling so weak around? There was nothing more to say about that. "It seems you don't understand anything about me or the past. Only two still stood at my leader...you after my father was exiled." He would take the risk in touching her raise his paw up to her chin to forcing so would look in dead in eyes. In his ice blue orbs was rage and fury with possible a little sorrow mixed with in. "I would anything to see your happy. I rather see the world burn before I see you hurt. My father was plague among toms but the effect of what he did burn my reputation to the ground. I would let do the same to your.We can't you understand! It was selfless because I care enough to ruin myself for you even if you didn't want it."Ah but he didn't failed in some argued Icemask hurt her but then he wanted her to hate him. It would made it so much easy to just let go but there she was back picking at his borders. If only he push hard. "I am not normal Tawsyshine nor can I never be again. The Icemask of the past has lone since been die and scattered to the winds.Accepted it. Life goes on with or without me. You made it then after all what is the difference?" The clan as whole was part to him but them on individuals scale. He wants to serve his clan, to serve his leader. "I wasn't talking about everyone-Tawsyshine! I was talking about you if you didn't see that already."tag: soot,
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Post by soot on Mar 20, 2020 3:49:20 GMT -5
| S he stood before Icemask, watching as he sunk his claws into the soft earth beneath them. Her gaze held strong but she could see this was a conversation she was beginning to lose. Clearly, she’d rushed things and perhaps she’d been a bit overzealous. How could she have expected Icemask to want to talk so quickly ? At his touch, her breath stilled. She was taken aback by Icemask’s sudden emotional boldness. It was unexpected and quite frankly, almost startling. His eyes held a vast array of emotions as he spoke quietly to her. She found herself frozen under his gaze. Badly, she wanted to reach out and soothe him, to find the source of all his agony and extinguish it. “Icemask,” She began, her voice barely a whisper. It was soft and full of sorrow. “You are not your father. No cat thinks you are one in the same and I know for certainty that nobody thinks of you as a plague of any kind” She responded. Her gaze turned fierce as she began to reply to his self-loathing remarks. “I don’t want you to ruin yourself for me, I want you to realize that it’s okay to be hurt. Icemask, no cat expects you to not be impacted by the actions of your father. But nobody thinks you are or ever will be anything like him!” Tawnyshine’s words had taken on a fierceness that she hadn’t expected. But the calico molly couldn’t stand to think that her once childhood friend thought any of the sentiments he’d just shared were true. She refused to let him believe such blatant lies. Frowning, she practically cut him off; “Icemask no! You can be normal again, you just need to let yourself recover from the past!” With a sweep of her long tail, Tawnyshine lifted her head, just out of his paw, and then firmly declared; “Icemask, you can be normal again. I know you can, and you can move past this. Please, Icemask, let me help you,” She pleaded. |
credit to nat of adoxography.
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Aria
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Post by Aria on Mar 22, 2020 0:03:29 GMT -5
in three words i can sum up everything
i've learned about life: it goes on
"I know I'm not my father Tawsyshine but..." No, Icemask wasn't his father not by a landslide however he couldn't just let the past go so early. He had his sins craved on his body since the moment he father was dragged out the nursery. They couldn't just disappear in blink of an eye. She did really believe it was so easy or maybe Tawsy was just that naive? He couldn't tell nor understand. "You can't speak for everyone, Tawnsyshine. There always those who hates me for what he did." Icemask known as the stone cold warrior who didn't care seem about one other than his past mentor. Now seems to care about else. He felt a growing limp in her throat.The bengal had caught her in another white lie. He expression seems rather stiff expected for a frown. He really did missed her so much and in effort to soothe her press his face against her shoulder. It was shocking how much a child such a cruel tom had became in a matter of moments. "Can you look me in eyes and tell not a thing cat hates me? You can't because it's true their will always be a cat who can hold a grudge against me matter how much I try I can't pleased everyone."He shook a bit before pressing into her soft form like a kit would do to it's mother. Icemask felt so cold to be honest and it wasn't right at all. "Tawy-Tai. I can't be normal even at my very best I know there a piece of me I can never get back. I don't want go back to my weaker childish self i once was. I can't want to be normal like that again." Too many breaks heart and promises had torn his souls but maybe just maybe a little of could be save. "How do I know this would bring you down? How will know I wouldn't fail you?"tag: soot ,
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Post by soot on Mar 22, 2020 2:40:07 GMT -5
| I cemask’s words seem to stump her for a moment. Tawnyshine holds his gaze, finally, it seemed, at a loss for words. What could she say ? He was right. Icemask couldn’t do anything about the cats who would hate him forever, even if he hadn’t done anything wrong himself. He was still associated with his father. How silly, it seemed for a moment while his words hung in the air, that something as invisible and unnoticable like a family tree, could be so determining of one’s self. And for a moment, she had every right to be at a loss for words, because Icemask was right, to some degree. Tawnyshine hadn’t ever known the kind of trauma he knew. Her childhood, with Embershade, had been peachy keen and Icemask didn’t have the luxury to say the same. She frowned, but expression shifted into shock as Icemask’s face was pressed into her shoulder. She peered at him, and then replied reassuringly; “Maybe you’re right Icemask, maybe you can’t please everyone. But you can at least try pleasing yourself. Make yourself happy.” Her voice had taken up that pleading tone again, but she heard a difference in the silver tom’s voice. “You can be normal again Icemask, but you don’t need to go back to being the cat you used to be. You can rebuild yourself from that cat. I know you can. You were strong once, you can be strong again.” Quietly, she looked up again. It was funny, almost how time had flown. The sky was brightening just over the tops of the looming willows, light sneaking its way inside the grotto, in rays of pale gold. And as she turned to look Icemask in the eyes, she could hear the distant sound of robins calling out. “Icemask,” She began softly. Her voice was full of emotion as she bent to return the gesture of affection; “You could never bring me down. You could never fail me. I know you won’t and I need you to realize it too.” |
credit to nat of adoxography.
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Aria
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Post by Aria on Mar 22, 2020 21:30:40 GMT -5
in three words i can sum up everything
i've learned about life: it goes on
Icemask softly purred rather content on just remain right here. She was so warm compared him. So innocent, so caring Tawnyshine didn't know that half on it. There so many emotions and feeling he had lost in the passage of time.Now they resurfacing and he was scared of it more than anything in his life. If was she said was true about being able to change or if anyone could help change him. He would be happy that it's her. "I really wish I couldn't believe you. I truly do but now I can't not yet." He replied savoring her warm. "But I'll allow you to let help me if it's somehow I can change." With that he pulled away from and began to walked away. Icemask just want to stay in her embrace longer but if he did then he might do things he wasn't ready for just yet. "I need some to think on few things but maybe we talk tomorrow night." He look at with small glint of hope in his eyes but before finally departing into the night. "I see you soon."tag: soot Notes: I thought this a good way to end their first thread. If you want reply up to you.
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